The Dash of the Valkyries

We said we were going to do it… and we did!  The following post is by my mom regarding our rampage stroll through the Arizona battleground.  The weather was gorgeous, the crowd was big, the costumes were insane and I believe a great time was had by all.  🙂

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Warrior Dash Valkyrie in Training – Jumping the fire was the least of our worries.

Well, it’s over, done, kaput, fini and I prevailed, conquered, triumphed, SURVIVED!  I don’t quite feel like a Valkyrie; that seems too lofty a status to claim.  However, I do feel like a pretty tough old dame; a survivor.  In addition, successfully completing the Warrior Dash has given me new motivation to continue my training and weight loss.

The big day was April 28 and Team Geezer had shrunk from 6 to 3; Wendy, a true Valkyrie; Jessica, another tough old dame; and me, the Valkyrie in training. 


Actually, my daughter, Wendy, is only an honorary geezer.  At the age of 40 and a dedicated extreme runner, she is in her prime and quite physically fit.  You only have to read the other entries on her blog to get that.   We both pretend that I am not 27 years older and a couch potato wannabe.  She motivates me, encourages me, enables me in my delusion that I can do this, and delights in my success.  Wendy started this quest by challenging me 8 months ago.

The day was hot, the venue dusty, the crowd large and rowdy.  Over the next 2 days, 10,000+ aspiring warriors would don buffalo horns, roar excitedly, and enthusiastically tackle 14 hazards in pursuit of a pot metal disc; the “Bling”, the proof that we successfully participated in the silliest endeavor of our lives to this point.  We are all survivors of some sort and most of us have survived other challenging and even life threatening events.  However, the Warrior Dash has the distinction of being a life threatening event in which everyone volunteers to place themselves at risk for no gain other than bragging rights.  Human beings; go figure.  Are we missing a chemical of some sort?  We do love to live on the edge.  Even at the age of 67, I still fall prey to this flaw in the human psyche.  As a matter of fact, I wasn’t even the oldest in the Dash.  My, oh my; the lengths to which we will go to prove ourselves indestructible. 

The Dash was both better and worse than anticipated.  We started off at an optimistic trot in the first wave of the day; my hubby rolling video of the screaming, bouncing mob.  The costumes were wild; a flock of batmen (and batwomen) in boxers, perky hard bodies in everything from yoga gear to bikinis, a pair of hunks in drag, more hunks in tutus and unitards.   Team Geezer was spiffy in hot pink shirts announcing our war cry (and our combined ages) in glitter; “200+ Years of Survival!”. The committed and seriously determined competitors had stripped down to their trunks and six packs; they took off at a dead run and never looked back. 

Did the top guy really finish all 5k in only 21 minutes?  Yup; the 5k and all the crazy obstacles along the way, including 4 walls, 2 sets of cargo nets, a fire pole, a junk yard of rusted cars, a tightrope across a pool of mud, another pool (of more mud) with a particularly refreshing waterfall to climb (and another d@$%@&d wall to slide down), two rows of fire, and the dreaded mud wallow.  Twenty one minutes?  Seriously?  I felt good to finish in 1 hour, 19 minutes and change.  I felt even better when I discovered that participants half my age took twice the time.  I guess there is something to Geezer Power, after all.  Of course, in retrospect, my competitive side emerges and I add caveats like, we dawdled (true); however, the whole truth is that we took it slow on purpose.  We were just out to enjoy the day and get through the course together.  We accomplished both goals in spades.   We all took a lot of pleasure in the Warrior Dash…after it was over.  (It’s a good thing no one asked me if I was having fun during the traverse of the triple wide cargo net.  My response would not have been printable.)

The obstacles were tough, which gives me a great deal of personal satisfaction, having been able to surmount them with no more than scraped knees and sore shoulders for my trouble.  I could have done without the mud wallow and the fire hose shower afterward.  However, I can never get enough of the laughter we shared.  The next morning, Wendy and I walked 6 ½ miles and chattered about the Dash the whole way.  It had been a great weekend and a great time spent with my daughter; more memories to add to our collection of laughs we will share when I am 90 and no longer able to do this crazy stuff.   I still have a few years between now and 90…hmmm…next year?


About wfig

Longtime horsewoman and hiker, occasional world traveler and professional biologist.
This entry was posted in Races, Review, Running Bling and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to The Dash of the Valkyries

  1. We actually did it, didn’t we? Jess made a refrigerator magnet out of her medal. I guess it is a little heavy for a Christmas tree ornament. What do I do with it? Pappy says I should hang it on a peg and start a collection. HA!!

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